Desiree Panlilio Website

Desiree Panlilio

Teen Life Coach

Desiree Panlilio is a Teen Life Coach and the Owner of Encouraging Teens, LLC. With over three years of experience, she specializes in helping teens and young adults define roles, set goals, develop healthy academic and personal habits, grow in leadership potential, and create their life paths. Desiree holds a BSN in Nursing from The University of Victoria and an MA in Human Services Counseling with a concentration in Life Coaching from Liberty University.

wikiHow's Editorial ProcesswikiHow partners with over 1000+ experts from a wide range of fields to ensure our content is accurate and based on well-established research and testimony. Content Managers conduct interviews and work closely with each expert to review information, answer reader questions, and add credible advice. Learn more about our editorial process and why millions of readers trust wikiHow.

Forum Comments (12)

fake friends: what should I do?
Wow, that is a difficult situation. If this person is your bestie, it is worth having an honest conversation. Share how you are feeling and how what she is saying about you affects you. Set a clear boundary and let her know that comments about your body are not okay. While her new friend group may be influencing her behavior, she is still responsible for her choices. Most importantly, protect your confidence. Real friendship should build you up, not slowly chip away at your self-worth. A great opportunity to purchase the book One Friend? Two Friends? Good Friend? Bad Friend?: Teen's Guide to Creating Lifelong Friendships. This book will help you understand and develop the friendships that encourage and inspire you.
The friend drama. I need advice please
This is a tough spot to be in. I would first encourage you to talk with your friends, all three of you together. By all three of you talking together, no one can say anything that can be misunderstood. Ask your friends if everything is okay, explaining that you noticed a change in how they are treating you since they made up – yes, be honest and share that you know they made up. Being honest helps everyone to be on the same page.

Let them know you value their friendship and you want to understand what happened. If they are not willing to talk with you, give it a little more time and approach them again. If they still don't want to talk, it may be time to involve the school counselor or a teacher you admire or respect, to help bridge the friendship. Sometimes having an adult help with explaining emotions and feelings is very helpful when our feelings are hurt.

In the future, if these two friends have a "fight" and come to you, I would share that the "fight" is between them, and that you value each of their friendships but refuse to listen to a problem that should remain between them.
How can one make high school something to the fullest? What was some of the best times you had?
I would encourage you to take advantage of any high school experience you are interested in, or may even push you out of what you would normally do. Why not join a running club, or try out for high jump in high school? Embracing these new experiences builds your confidence that you are capable of more than you realize. It allows you to try something that may lead to something you enjoy, or may lead to a fun story to share in the future. Either way, experiences in high school are about expanding who you are, challenging yourself to grow and stretch to keep pushing what your unlimited potential is. Gaining the confidence now to try take part in those high school experiences will help you to take advantage of experiences you may be offered later in your career and life.
How do i talk to this guy at school?
What a great opportunity. If he is new to school and you only see him at lunch, go sit with him. Walk up, introduce yourself, and start with something like, "I see you are new to the school". Tell him your name and one thing about yourself. "Hi I am ____. I have seen you in the cafeteria, and I realize you are new to the school. Mind if I join you for lunch?" Tell him things like, "I really enjoy _____", or "What is your favorite sport? What classes do you have?" You can connect over a sport, a class, or a teacher. Creating a new friendship is always a positive, and who knows what happens next!
I don't know whether i should end my friendship or not
Friendships are tough, especially when you have been friends for so long. Have you had an honest conversation with your friend? Tell her that you do not share the same rebellious feelings. That you value your education, value the opportunity to learn. That you want to be her friend, but your values and beliefs do not allow you to be late for school, rebel against others, and not create the future of success that you want for yourself. The other part of the conversation is to ask your friend why the behavior has changed. Don't ask why once, but ask why three times. Has something changed so that your friend has changed their behavior? Friends hold each other accountable, encourage one another, and never make one go against their values or boundaries. I have written a book on Teen Friendship which would be helpful. Here is the link.
See more comments

Q&A Comments (35)

See more comments

Co-authored Articles (46)

30 Things to Do at a Sleepover

What’s better than a night of fun with your friends? Hosting a sleepover is a great way to bond with your BFFs while you laugh the night away. But once everyone is there, what do you actually ''do''? Not to worry—we�...

26 Inexpensive Ways to Have Fun with Your Friends Any Time of the Week

Looking for something to do? It’s time to send out that group invite because you’re about to have plans. With our help, you’ll never run out of things to do. Whether you’re flush with cash or want to have fun for...

30+ Fun Things to Do Without Going on Your Phone

Try one of these no-phone activities to wind down and stay focused If you find yourself checking or scrolling through your phone whenever you have some free time, it’s probably time to find alternative ways to beat yo...

What to Do When You're Bored at Night: 20 Fun Things to Do

Whether you can't sleep or you've just got time on your hands, being bored at night stinks! Fortunately, there are lots of things you can do to enjoy the evening without breaking the bank or relying on screens. We've put...

How to

Convince Your Parents to Get You Something

All parents are different and some are more lenient than others. Getting what you want doesn't always happen and you should be open to getting turned down. If you do the proper planning for your request, they might just ...

Which Type of Teen Am I Quiz

Teens are all different: there are jocks, preps, alternatives, and so many more. What “type” of teen are you? Take this quiz, and we’ll tell you! link=|alt=Three teens standing next to each other and engaged in ...

What Do Teenage Guys Find Attractive? 13 Things Guys Like

You know that girl—the one all the boys want? That’s you after you finish reading this article. Figuring out what teen guys want is like unraveling a mystery, but we’ve cracked their code and are ready to help you ...

18 Ways to Earn Money as a Teen

The best side hustles for teens with no job experienceFrom new shoes to video games, the world is full of things to buy! But what can you do if your wallet’s empty and you’re under the age of 18? We’ve compiled a l...

Productive Activities for when You're Bored at Home or Work

Getting things done when you’ve got nothing else to do Sure, you’re bored and have a little free time on your hands, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be productive. When life gives you downtime, you squeeze all yo...

How to

Convince Your Parents to Let You and Your Friends Go Out

Whether you want to hang out with your friends at the mall for an afternoon, go to an upcoming event, or go to your friend's house, you may need to get permission from your parents first. Especially if you have overprote...

30+ Ways to Have Fun with Your Friends for Guys

The best ideas for an unforgettable night with your boysIt’s always fun hanging out with your friends, but sometimes you might have a hard time figuring out what to do when you’re together. That’s where we come in!...

What's the Right Age to Start Wearing Makeup? A Guide for Parents and Kids

Figuring out the right age to wear makeup can be confusing! Whether you're a parent wanting to help your child through this rite of passage, or a middle schooler or high schooler wanting to try out a social media trend a...

How to

Drop Out of High School

Dropping out of high school is a serious decision that many people often regret later in their life. A high school diploma is required for many jobs and college attendance. However, if you are sure that dropping out is...

What to Do on a Friday Night: 20 Great Suggestions

Friday night finally rolls around and you don’t have any plans, so what do you do? Don’t waste your night of freedom—have some fun! Whether you’re staying in and need ideas for an entertaining night at home, or y...

27 Expert-Approved Things to Say to Someone Who Feels Overwhelmed

Plus, what not to say and how to support themWhen someone you know is overwhelmed and stressed, you might feel helpless and unsure of what to say to comfort them. We're here to help with 27 phrases you can say whenever y...

How to

Persuade Your Parents to Let You Have a Sleepover

It's not always easy to convince your parents to let you have a sleepover, especially if they're the overprotective types. It's natural that your parents would worry about you having friends sleep over. Not only will the...

How to

Be Popular in High School

You don't need to wait for a new school year to start to become popular at your school—you can become well-liked any time you want! It might seem a little intimidating to navigate the social world of high school, but d...

160 Fun Things to Do with Family of All Ages

Save your family from boredom with these creative activities It’s inevitable—someone in your family says they’re bored and now you’re frantically trying to come up with something fun to do. Don’t worry. We’ve...

How to

Convince Your Parents

We’ve all been there: there’s something that you want more than anything, but you’ve got to find a way to get your parents to agree to it. Whether it’s a new pair of shoes, a car, or a trip somewhere, convincing ...

How to

Pack for a Sleepover (Teens)

You're super stoked about tonight's sleepover, but what on earth should you pack? Don't worry, we've got you covered! Check out our handy packing list for a breakdown of overnight essentials you can toss into your bag be...
See more articles