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A deep dive into the BPD stare + why the eyes look black or empty
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When it comes to borderline personality disorder (BPD), many symptoms are misunderstood or unknown. BPD eyes are among the debated symptoms. Although they aren’t officially recognized by the medical community, many people with BPD recognize BPD eyes as something they’ve been dealing with their entire lives. So many, in fact, that the term’s gone viral on platforms like TikTok and Facebook. If you’ve seen the trend and are confused, read on, as we explain what BPD Eyes are, whether or not they’re real, what makes them look different, and more!

Section 1 of 5:

What are BPD eyes?

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  1. BPD eyes are dark and dilated, with a deep, focused stare. BPD eyes are often called “shark eyes,” due to their intense, hyper-focused gaze and wide, black-looking pupils. It’s a term that refers to the eyes of someone with borderline personality disorder, especially when they’re dealing with stress, trauma, self-doubt, paranoia, or feelings of abandonment. It’s believed that people with BPD have “empty” looking eyes because they’re dissociating, having trouble regulating or processing their emotions, or trying to read other people.[1]
    • What do BPD eyes say about someone’s emotional state? BPD eyes can be a signal that a person is experiencing an episode of emotional dysregulation, dissociation, and/or high stress.
    • BPD eyes are also known as a “unicorn gaze” or “borderline gaze.”
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Section 2 of 5:

Are BPD eyes real?

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  1. However, some people believe they’re a real phenomenon. On social media, some people with bipolar personality disorder have talked about their experiences getting comments about how their eyes get vacant and stare off into nothing when dealing with intense thoughts and emotions. Many resonate with these comments, but the medical community does not officially recognize BPD eyes as a symptom of borderline personality disorder, confirms board-certified psychiatrist Dr. Agnes K. Simone, DO.[2]
    • Reddit Example: In a Reddit thread in r/BorderlinePDisorder, one Reddit user talked about their experience with BPD eyes, saying, “I was always told I had angry eyes, either that or cold and dark, maybe there is something to it.”
    • Reddit Example: In the same thread, another user said, “i was told i had dark eyes, glazed over. when im in a baddd episode, i was told i look paralyzed with fear.”
Section 3 of 5:

What makes BPD eyes different?

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  1. BPD eyes have been described as empty, with vacant expressions that are accompanied by intense gazes. “Normal” eyes, on the other hand, are described as openly expressive, displaying emotions such as sadness, happiness, and fear through widened pupils, furrowed brows, and/or larger pupils.[3]
    • At the end of the day, there are no “abnormal eyes,” and the comparison between BPD eyes and “normal eyes” isn’t rooted in science. People experiencing emotional pain are people first, not visual categories or online trends!
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Section 4 of 5:

Symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder

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  1. Dissociation might cause someone to have what's described as “BPD eyes.” It’s a mental process where a person disconnects from their thoughts, memories, and surroundings, usually in response to intense stress, trauma, or conflict. Oftentimes, this dissociation can go into overdrive, resulting in symptoms like:[4]
    • Shifting self-image: Quick changes in the way you see yourself, your goals, and your values. You may also perceive yourself as bad or feel like you don’t exist.
    • Stress-related paranoia: A paranoid, stressful feeling often accompanied by a loss of contact with reality.
    • Depersonalization: A loss of connection and attachment to your body and thoughts.
    • Poor memory: Blackouts, gaps in memory, or misremembering various situations during stressful events.
    • Derealization: Seeing the world as foggy, unreal, or dream-like.
    • Self-harm: Engaging in self-injury in order to shake a feeling of emotional numbness or depression, often with little recollection of the act.
  2. When someone has “BPD eyes,” it can mean they have trouble regulating their emotions. People with borderline personality disorder tend to feel things deeply, which may lead to outbursts, intense fears, and other emotional manifestations, such as:[5]
    • Fear of abandonment: A strong sense that others will abandon you at a moment’s notice. You may go to extreme measures to ensure you don’t feel rejected or separated, even if the fears aren’t valid.
    • Unstable, intense relationships: Shifting views on your relationships, like believing a person is perfect one moment, then quickly shifting to the idea that they’re cruel and don’t care enough about you.
    • Rapid mood swings: Wide mood swings that go from very happy to very irritable, angry, anxious, or ashamed over the course of hours or days.
    • Disproportional anger: Strong, inappropriate anger that can involve losing your temper often, feelings of sarcasm and bitterness, and physically fighting.
    • Impulsive, risky behavior: Risky behaviors such as gambling, dangerous driving, unsafe sex, drug use, binge eating, spending sprees, or suddenly cutting off good opportunities in your life.
    • Feelings of emptiness: A constant feeling of emptiness or loss.
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Section 5 of 5:

The Importance of Empathy Towards People with Borderline Personality Disorder

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  1. Licensed Clinical Social Worker Kathryn Garland, LCSW-S says that BPD has always been stigmatized, and it can be hard for people who receive that diagnosis not to internalize it in a negative way.[6] When you place people in a box based on their mental disorder, it can make them feel misunderstood, chastised, or dismissed. People who have borderline personality disorder deal with a wide range of intense emotions, so rather than singling them out and pushing their buttons, it’s best to treat them with empathy and understanding. The conversation around borderline personality disorder should center around compassion!
    • What does stigmatizing people with BPD look like? Treating their emotions as attention-seeking rather than taking them seriously; treating them as manipulative rather than trying to understand them.[7]

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About This Article

Dr. Agnes K. Simone, DO
Co-authored by:
Board-Certified Psychiatrist
This article was co-authored by Dr. Agnes K. Simone, DO and by wikiHow staff writer, Marcus Pruitt, BS. Dr. Agnes K. Simone, DO, is a UCLA-trained, board-certified psychiatrist in solo private practice in Los Angeles, CA. Through her general psychiatry practice, Dr. Simone provides whole-person, integrative psychiatric care with a focus on anxiety, OCD, ADHD, depression, and insomnia. She is the founder of Olea Women's Health, a boutique practice combining integrative psychiatric care and hormone therapy to support women through perimenopause, menopause, and midlife. She also founded Psych Practice Co to help psychiatrists launch and grow successful independent practices of their own. Dr. Simone earned her D.O. from Western University of Health Sciences and completed a Psychiatry Residency Program at UCLA. This article has been viewed 2,469 times.
1 votes - 0%
Co-authors: 7
Updated: July 15, 2026
Views: 2,469
Categories: Psychological Health

Medical Disclaimer

The content of this article is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, examination, diagnosis, or treatment. You should always contact your doctor or other qualified healthcare professional before starting, changing, or stopping any kind of health treatment.

Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 2,469 times.

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